Monday, September 01, 2008

EMMETT I KNOW IT WAS YOU. I CAN READ MINDS OKAY??? I HATE TO QUESTION YOUR INTELLIGENCE, BUT I MUST.

Copied flagrantly from Cookie, WITHOUT HER PERMISSION! Ohnoes&shi~nola.

1. My uncle once gave me his copies of the best sci-fi radio show ever, Searcher and Stallion. <3

2. Never in my life have I impressed people when I tried. I've given up and life is so much better.

3. When I was five, I got a third kidney.

4. High school was a hazy dream. Let's keep it that way.

5. I will never feel comfortable among people talking politics.

6. Once I met my knitting and blogging friends, I was happy to find that they're just as extraordinary as me.

7. There’s this boy I know but not in the Biblical sense.

8. Once, at a bar, I had German food and listened to German drunks singing German songs. It was awesome.

9. By noon, I have exercised, had breakfast, showered, and walked the dog. Don't judge me.

10. Last night, I wound the lace yarn for Mystery Stole 4.

11. If only I had the courage to stop people from abusing me and taking me for granted.

12. Next time I go to church I'll be fasting for a fast sell and a smooth move.

13. What worries me most are things I can't do anything about anyways.

14. When I turn my head left I see the future, hazy and impenetrable.

15. When I turn my head right I see the past, a guideline for the future but a hazard if one stares too long.

16. You know I’m lying when I use my sarcastic voice.

17. What I miss most about the Eighties was living in Germany and being a crazy kid who didn't worry about make-up or what people thought about me.

18. If I were a character in Shakespeare I’d be Beatrice.

19. By this time next year, I might have passed my CPNE. Positive thinking, go!

20. A better name for me would be spoken in awe by the people on the ground as I fly by in spandex.

21. I have a hard time understanding why people buy the phony 'sweetness' act. I don't.

22. If I ever go back to school, I’ll get my Bachelors in Nursing, I guess.

23. You know I like you if I engage in an actually conversation with you.

24. If I ever won an award, the first person I would thank would be: me. I worked darn hard for that award, I deserve a little accolade for myself.

25. Take my advice: don't bother asking me, go see a dang doctor already.

26. My ideal breakfast is flavored instant oatmeal. Sorry, Alton Brown, but I love it.

27. A song I love but do not have is: hard to find. *coff*

28. If you visit my hometown, I suggest you lose yourself downtown for a week.

29. Why won’t people shut their yaps for a moment and actually comprehensively listen? Take a few moments, consider what the person is trying to actually say, THEN respond.

30. If you spend a night at my house, bring your own coffee.

31. I’d stop my wedding for an act of God, like a tornado or lightning in the sky spelling Surrender Dorothy "DON'T DO IT".

32. The world could do without chiggers, lousy pestilences of the Universe with no real reason to exist.

33. I’d rather lick the belly of a cockroach than take up smoking.

34. My favorite blondie is canine (I love Goldies).

35. Paper clips are more useful than a horde of handsome men holding papers together in bundles, but not as attractive!

36. If I do anything well, it's obviously due to me being fabulous.

37. I can’t help but cry when I'm angry. Ugh.

38. I usually cry when I'm PMSing.

39. My advice to my nephew/niece: be true to who you really are inside. Follow the herd only if they're going your way.

40. And by the way, my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. ;)

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